My Cute Bum
for Jacinta

© 2004 Matt Henry


Hey everybody, look at my cute bum
It's so darn cute you'll be struck dumb
You might think your bum is something to see
But it's nothing compared to the bum on me


My mom's a hippy, my diapers are cloth
To the laundry machine when they get ripped off
My diapers will sit in no landfill
But filling up diapers, oh yes, I will

All babies' bums we know are smooth
And it's not that I have something to prove
But even other babies turn and look twice
Their bums come to mine to get advice

Only two of the five senses are pleased
So stick to looking and giving a squeeze
These pudgy little cheeks in my diaper space
Are smaller than the cheeks that are on my face

I'll repeat again: my bum's so small
That twenty of me equals one of y'all
I want to be sure that you understand
That my two cheeks fit in your one hand

Don't let your envy turn to hate
When you see my bum I see you salivate
Yet even at that you will be fooled
You think my bum is good, you should see me drool