Familiar faces and smells

Good evening :) Another week has passed and I write to you from yet another new location. I am in Almont, Michigan. It is 9pm and I can still see the sun setting out my window. The girls are sleeping sweetly nearby and I still see their faces by the light of the sun. Jess asked before she fell asleep, “Mommy, why is there no white light when I go to sleep in Australia?” I told her that the sun shined on each place around the world as long as it could, and that summer sun shined later than winter sun. She yawned, and stayed up for another story read by Matt.

In Wisconsin, Illinois and Indiana the sun goes to bed a bit earlier, but Michigan is right on the edge of the Eastern time zone. Monday morning we continued or journey around Lake Michigan and made it to my dad’s house in Mokena, Illinois. It was great to see my dad and Barb, but even greater to see the joy on their faces in meeting Genevieve for the first time and seeing how Jacinta had grown. We spent hours outside playing in their beautiful yard, picking strawberries, jumping from one stepping stone to another, watching bunnies and birdies, napping, swinging and making leaf soup. Matt and dad played with recording equipment and actually got some real work done. One highlight was going to Jeffrey’s baseball game. Jeff is my step brother, he is 25 years old and autistic. We have always heard about all of his athletic activities and how happy belonging to a team makes him, but this was the first time we were able to actually witness it. After two short nights we were on our way.

Wednesday morning we drove an hour to my mom’s house in Valparaiso, Indiana. Seeing my mom after a very important year (birth for me and dodging cervical cancer for her) of missing her was overwhelming. It was intensified by the emotion I knew she felt for meeting my newest daughter and seeing my big girl after a year of absence. We’re the young couple off following our dreams. I can’t imagine how hard it will be to play the part of the mom staying at home, hoping my little girl is happy. Anyway, our two short days together were awesome. Jess and mom spent hours stamping cards together. Jess is very selective on whom she lets in to her “circle of trust” these days and my mom is in. I sit back and cross my fingers hoping that she will not cling to me but allow others who love her in. I rejoiced with every story mom read to Jess. I then cringed as Jacinta stubbornly treated her the same way I treated her during piano lessons. We made birthday cake and celebrated Jacinta’s big day once more before the real thing. My mom played the piano for the girls and I, this is one of the most important events in my visits home. We went to the zoo and then had the windiest picnic I’ve ever experienced on Lake Michigan. We played in the sandbox, played cards and dominoes, oohed and ahhed over Genevieve, and watched her roll over and over.

Evie has mastered the technique and will no longer lie on her back. She instantly rolls over onto her stomach and holds herself up high on her elbows. After a while she drops her head and tries like hell to crawl. Naturally, she can not because she is three months old and has no upper body strength. She draws her knees up under her belly, smashes her face into the floor, gets frustrated and starts to snort and snuff. We roll her back over again and start over. Once she makes it into your arms, she likes to practice standing and stepping, somewhat like she’s doing a jig. Genevieve has also learned to grip objects like hair, fake monkeys and parrots. After months of thinking, “oooh…I like that thing,” she’s now thinking, “I want that thing and I’m gonna get it!” And she grabs it, victory! She seems to have a strong will to move, and to stay awake. I fear her will is so strong she might start crawling unnaturally early. I hope I am wrong!

After a whirlwind visit with my parents, we drove to Detroit. We dropped off our rental car, and were then picked up by our friend Cindy. We had lunch at our favorite Thai restaurant in Ferndale, stopped at the church to say hello, dropped Cindy off and took her van to camp. She and her family have lent it to us for the whole summer, nice aye? I may not be able to drive it if I cannot prove residency and renew my license, such is life. We are now at camp, settled. As a younger woman, I never appreciated “settlement.” I sought constant change, the nomadic life was glorious. I am a mother now, rejoicing to be in one place and not having to pack my bags for a while.

Genevieve couldn’t care less; warm tender arms, warm milk, and a good sleep are all she needs. Jacinta was uprooted, like a strong little seedling plucked out of one garden later transplanted in a different garden. She has withered, needed extra support, cuddles, sunlight and water. She is slowly coming back to herself, almost able to stand strong again. Watching my big girl wither in the wind made me ecstatic to arrive at camp this weekend and wholly embrace the time I have with just my girls. We will be here for two months. I thought I’d be on the phone right away trying to find a way back out to the suburbs to visit my friends, but I have decided to just enjoy sinking back into life at camp with a new position, mom.

It’s amazing walking down the steps of the Lodge (our home for the summer) to the laundry room. It smells exactly like it did eleven years ago when I first came to Skyline and fell in love with Matt within my first week at camp. I have visited this camp many times between now and then during the fall or early spring, but never in the summer. The summertime smells are so particular, although I can not name one flower or tree that adds to this beautiful fragrance. We’ve moved up in the building, no longer do we sleep downstairs in the bunk rooms. We are upstairs in the best room with our own bathroom to share with our two daughters. I no longer do laundry for one teenage girl, but for a family of four. Our clothes are no longer dirt and sweat stained, but soiled by regurgitated milk. There are still exciting young adults sharing our living space. Now rather than being thankful merely for a good chat, I give thanks for all of the extra loving arms to rock and play with Genevieve and for all of the kind souls who answer some of Jacinta’s “why?” questions.

Jacinta is happy to be here. It has been a long voyage, and she has been a trooper. Her cough is almost gone, and we think she has finally adjusted to the time zone. She is baffled as to why we eat in a building outside of our house. She is ecstatic to have a tricycle to stroll around the spacious living room, back veranda, and front patio. Each day we explore another small area of the 156 acres here at camp. Today’s highlights were jumping on a huge pile of sand, playing tether ball, piggy back rides, checking out the ropes course and collecting treasures in her purse. She found a tree with leaves shaped like hearts and picked two, “this one’s for Genevieve and the big one is for me.” She smiles at herself in the mirror and says, “Look how long my hair is now!”

Jess is hesitant to let people in these days. Perhaps she fears we will have to say goodbye in just a few days, or maybe she’s just a normal child. My family and the staff here at camp are very understanding and know that after she realizes we are not leaving just yet, she may recognize their presence. After camp, we will spend more time with my family. We went to church on Saturday night to the Jazz service and caught up with many old friends. Jess fled as if she was about to be thrown up on stage and made to sing and dance. She clung to Cindy and to one woman who she just met at camp, far from her parents who were in the middle of the crowd. A cookie helped her stay with us for a few minutes, but knowing she could go to the nursery and play with toys and one teenage girl she had never met, she fled that crowded room as fast as she could. It was a little sad for all of us, knowing that this little girl, so loved, clothed and held by this church for the first 15 months of her life couldn’t summon the energy to endure the reunion. But, what can you expect of a three year old? We took her away to a new home where her biggest gathering is playgroup and that is her new comfort zone.

Matt has eased right back into life at camp. He has spent the past few days planning with the other program staff, sitting around a table covered in papers and cups of tea.

He finally has the opportunity to vent his half baked ideas to people who can actually do something with the ideas. He has even visited Dunkin Donuts a few times, and found others who esteem this fine establishment as highly as he does. This is camp, without campers.

We are working for one of our best friends here, Chris the camp director. She, being an amazing lady has hired a lot of amazing people with whom we have a lot in common. Visiting the church and so many old friends we love was so comforting. Eating out in our old town was great: Thai food, then Ethiopian food! Oh my oh my! I even had the chance to shop at my old natural food store, this is heaven on earth.

So life thus far is wonderful. We are living in community with awesome people, a short drive away from many people we love, and a hop, skip and a jump away from squirrels, bunnies, deer, hiking trails and a pool. AND there is a kitchen staff who cooks for us! Jess is falling in love with the place, Genevieve was happy the second she walked into all these kid-loving smiley faces, and Matt and I get to celebrate life with our children in a place that’s very existence brought us together. We couldn’t ask for much more.

Hope spring is full of lovely familiar smells and faces for you all too.

Peace,

Shana

We made it!

Good evening loved ones. This would be an American evening, an Australian afternoon, and entirely too late for me or Genevieve to be up. It’s almost 1am and I’ve got the little grunter in my arms. She’s eagerly reaching for her toes, drooling and excitedly reading every word I write :) It looks as if she’d like to take over, but I’m not sure how she’d recount the last week’s events. She might say, “Yummmy milk! The vibrations of this plane make me sleeepy…Ouch! My sister squeezes my hand too hard. Oooh those tree branches blowing in the wind are fun to watch! Mmmm I love blowing spit bubbles.

It has been the longest week ever, perhaps due to lack of sleep and because Friday lasted 37 hours. It’s hard to believe that one week ago the girls and I spent a long lovely day playing at the beach with Michelle and Rory picnicking in the sand, crawling like lizards on our bellies in the shallow water, and running up and down little dunes. Today we (my sister’s family and mine) spent the day inside because Jess and Kai have terrible colds. To go outside we bundled up with coats and hats to get some fresh air. After a short little frolic in the yard Jacinta wanted to go back inside, “My hands are too cold!” Just last week we were out in the mountains at Nickolas’s party saying goodbye when Jacinta and Nickolas hugged goodbye so hard they fell over and knocked their heads on the wood floor. Today we are in suburban Milwaukee playing with “baby Kai,” my sweet little one year old nephew who I have mostly seen growing up over the internet. Jess and Kai aren’t exactly hugging, but competing for toys and attention. Seeing the “grown up” Kai in the flesh is wonderful, but children can’t pretend that distance doesn’t matter. He doesn’t know us, perhaps over the next few months we can convince him of how cool we are, even though we live too far for a hug on the holidays.

So after weeks of strategic packing agony, it is finally over. Keith helped Jess and I fertilize all of the trees and we left them in his loving care. They might do even better now with his attention. We packed up the house, shut down all electrical appliances, cleaned out the toilet and tried to make things as rodent proof as we could. Matt placed moth balls all over the place and we cleaned up. Leaving the house with Keith and Mary is so comforting, we have no worries at all. We said goodbye to our close friends and drove to Sydney on Thursday morning.

We saw a few close friends in Sydney and finished off Friday morning at Genevieve’s godparents’ house. Anne Marie, Bernie, Matt, Jess and I had an informal baptismal celebration for Genevieve. We had planned to do this in the garden but it was pouring rain. It was lovely to have a service in such close company, in lieu of having a church to welcome Genevieve into the family. Matt wrote the service, including the reading of a children’s story called the Blessing Seed. Anne Marie had some holy water she had brought home from Lourdes, France. She and Bernie baptized her just as they baptized their little girl just months before, a few hours before Teresa passed away. We lit candles for both girls, Genevieve and Teresa. We sang songs and anointed her with oil all the while she looked around bright eyed and happy. Jacinta turned the pages in the story and after being very patient, had the honor of lighting two more candles and then blowing them all out. It was a very special time for all of us.

It’s important to have something deep and meaningful before subjecting oneself to airline travel. After a bit of finagling at the counter due to a canceled flight Matt found a way to get us seated together on a new flight headed to LA rather than San Francisco, followed by an extra one hour flight to San Fran, then on to Chicago.

Although poor little Jacinta was very sick, the girls were angel travelers. Even with angels flying and sleeping in your arms 29 hours of airports and airplanes is grueling. Positive events included sitting next to a nice family with children to play with on the plane and meeting a good friend in San Fran who brought us joy, food and even money! But then one hour before our next flight we realized that I had managed to lose my purse somewhere in LA including 2 drivers’ licenses, credit cards, and both pacifiers. By this time Jacinta’s eyes were dripping, her nose was dripping, she was coughing and we looked like horrible parents torturing our poor little girl. On our last flight all four of us slept soundly for a few hours and finally! We triumphantly walked out of our last airport at about 1am with Jacinta calling out in her groggy froggy sick voice, “We made it!” She joyously ran into her Uncle Ben’s arms and soon we were off to Milwaukee, in a car :)

This is Genevieve’s first time in the USA and she has come to a good season. The scent of spring is divine here. It’s so easy now to remark on the scents and sights since I have been away for a while. Lilacs, cherry blossoms, fresh cut grass, and new life are lovely smells. Lecia and Ben took us on a nice walk near Lake Michigan. We pushed both sick Jacinta and sick Kai in the strollers while Evie rode in the carrier. You know Jess is down when she wants to sit in the stroller at a park and just watch.

When Evie had her first roll on the grass, Jacinta summoned the energy to come out and play. Genevieve is very eager to lie on her belly now. We are starting to notice her complaining while lying on her back. She twists her head in such a way that she can almost turn from her back to her belly, her only obstacle being the inside arm stuck under her belly. It’s funny how quickly weather can change in the US, being 82 on Saturday and 49 on Sunday. I have been watching the wind and it has been blowing almost constantly since we arrived. On Saturday it was warm wind, but on Sunday you could feel the ice in it. This icy wind is something people in our part of Australia never experience, how terribly sad.

Staying on the sad note, looking at Jess for the past few days has made us sad. Other than her cold, she is also experiencing her first separation sadness. She has been in the same place for the most conscious part of her life. She mostly knows what to expect and who to expect it from in Macksville. She doesn’t have the words for missing her home but she lets it out in other ways. She insisted that after we drove to Sydney we’d be driving straight back to Macksville, so she could read a certain book upon return. When we got on the first plane she asked where a musical glow worm toy was. After weeks of strategic packing, the hour before we left Keith gave her this glow worm to take along in the car. I allowed it to come in the car, but no way did we have any extra room in our luggage nor would anyone on the plane enjoy a musical toy. In my mind, leaving glow worm in the trunk was a no-brainer. When I told Jacinta that it had stayed in the car, her eyes welled up with tears. In the saddest voice you can think of, she replied… “but that was from Grandma and Pop.” Matt and I tried to respond and explain how many other toys she had brought that were from Grandma and Pop, but our hearts broke seeing our big girl cry for the first time about something besides physical pain or losing a battle of wills.

It has been a few days and Jacinta is on the mend. She loves her herbal medicine and is drinking lots of water and tea. She doesn’t look near as pathetic and is smiling more. She has enough energy to play and be stubborn once again. Genevieve, Matt and I have managed to stay healthy. We are enjoying catching up with my sister and family and can’t wait to introduce Genevieve and big Jacinta to my mom and dad. We managed to rent a car without our credit card (thanks Ben and Lecia) and we’re almost through our jet lag. I’ll close with a funnier story about our poor tired big baby.

This morning I woke up at 11am and the girls were still sleeping. I decided to wake Jacinta up first. I picked her up out of bed and asked her if she would like to have some breakfast. Usually she’ll act as if she was never asleep and dive straight into conversation. Not today! She could summon no words, she just cuddled me tightly.

After a few silent moments she whined in her croaky voice, “Turn out the light!” I told her that it was the sun and that there were no lights on. As we walked from room to room towards the kitchen she had the same request, “Turn out the light!” We couldn’t turn off the daylight, so she had to wake up. It is now late, and as I can not turn off the night, I must rejoice with it in slumber.

Sweet dreams,

Shana

Poor little balloons

Good evening y’all. This is the last journal I will write from Australia for a while. Next week at this time I will be in Milwaukee, sleeping at my sister’s house! I think I will try and keep up the journal, I just can’t think of any better way to spend my Saturday nights. I’m experiencing a bit of déjà vu, finally getting settled, loving my surroundings, being surrounded by people I love and leaving them all. This time it’s only for three months and not for an indefinite period of time.

Our street finally got recycling and garbage bins! What a luxury, we have been taking our recycling to our friends’ bins for a year and a half, and now we’re leaving! How can I leave my new recycling bin? Just kidding, it’s just a bit of hard plastic, friends and family are a bit more exciting. The great thing is that we are going to another place where we feel the same love and familiarity and it’s thousands of miles away, another home.

We’ve had a lovely week, we’re all mostly through our colds and able to be with friends again. Matt and I had a few cavities filled and refilled, that wasn’t so lovely but we like our dentist. Jacinta tells me each day that she’s “all betta!” The only reason she’s trying to convince me through her cough is so she can drink milk and have cheese again. (These are things we all love that I don’t allow when we are sick because it increases mucus.) She tells everyone else that, “I have a cold,” as a conversation starter. Monday we planted Jacinta’s pecan tree. Tuesday we had a nice playday with Nickolas and Sara starting at the park, followed by a walk to the fish man’s house, then a swim at the pool, lunch and play at home, ending with a jaunt to the garden. Wednesday we took a short trip out to Kempsey (45 minutes away) to visit the nursing home Mary runs. Mary’s colleagues and the elderly folk at the home had not yet met little Genevieve nor seen the great Jacinta in a while. Jacinta showed up with her doll tied onto her back and Genevieve in a smiley sweet mood to join everyone for morning tea. I just stood there and watched them make people happy. I’m just their chauffeur, and I enjoy that role. Little ones are just such a sight when you live in a place made up of only one generation.

That afternoon Jacinta’s little friend Nickolas came for a visit while his mum went to work. He is such a perfect match for Jacinta that I get more accomplished when he is here than when he is not. The children had plans: cutting with scissors, play dough, eating (of course), and having a bath. They would stick to one activity for a while needing very little help or direction, if any, then ask if they could move on. When they ran out of plans, they jumped in the bean bags and blankets, then went outside to play in the sandpit. It was a glorious half an hour with Genevieve sleeping in her crib and the “big kids” outside the window playing while I chopped vegetables.

Thursday was our last playgroup for a while. I suppose it will be playgroup every day at camp, the children will just be a bit older. I’m curious to see how Jacinta handles leaving all of her friends here to go and play with “big kids” at camp and her old Michigan baby friends who are all about three years old now. She tells everyone she is going “to America! To summer camp!” but has no idea what she is getting into. Jacinta is starting to notice familiar environments and discern her comfort level based on familiarity. She is very shy and sluggish in new places, yet boisterous and lively in places she knows. This is probably normal, I am perhaps freakish in my eternal love of newness and change.

Although…babies seem to thrive on a constant change of scenery too. Crying….why? Hungry? Poopy? Bloated? Tired? No! I just want to look out a different window mom! Genevieve likes hanging out in her crib more than Jess ever did, thanks to the mobiles. But she certainly prefers a cuddle and a walk around to experience different shades of light, shadows, and colorful walls. She spent a while gazing at Matt’s paint job on the girls’ bedroom walls. Now that she’s told me she doesn’t need to nap constantly, we spend more time playing on the floor. Evie loves to stand (supported of course) and wiggle around like a drunk. Placed on her belly she supports herself on her elbows, grabs the blanket in front of her, pushes on my hands with her feet and crawls. It must be so rewarding for her to actually get somewhere, to move off of the blanket. She works very hard and gets tired quickly. Choir nights are great for playtime. We spend a lot of time waiting around for other people to learn their parts so Genevieve and I have a good time playing on the floor. This is another place that I know my little girl makes a lot of people very happy. Our choir director sometimes jokingly scolds the alto section, “Stop baby gazing and sing!”

Jacinta has been singing lovely songs for us this week. Matt did some recording this week so Jacinta, naturally asked if she could too. She asked all week, so finally on Friday she gave it a whirl. She stood in front of the microphone, adjusted it, moved her chair in and out, and asked about the buttons. “What are you going to sing Jacinta?” Silence, the pressure was too great. Another repetitive question this week, besides “Why?” was, “Is today the day of Nickolas’s pahty?” All week the answer was no, but we worked on making his gift and cards. Jess drew a picture of herself bbq’ing a mouse with Nickolas by her side... interesting? I had this grand idea that we would dye him some silk for a cape. First off, there is no silk in Macksville, so we bought satin. I have since learned that satin is totally synthetic and can not be dyed. Perhaps my sewing machine sensed this was a pointless endeavor and therefore refused to cooperate. In the end, Matt took Jess to the toy store to buy a gift for her friend. She chose two little yellow trucks and a bottle of bubbles. A few months ago she tipped over Nickolas’s bubbles and remembered how sad he was when his mom informed him that there were no more bubbles. Matt was impressed that she could spend ten minutes in a toy store and never once think of herself, only of her friend and what he might like.

Finally this morning when Jacinta crawled into our bed and whispered in my ear, “Is today Nickolas’s pahty?” I could answer, “Yes! It’s today!” At the party, there was a tent full of balloons out on the grass for the children to pop and throw around. Why do I mention this? Balloons are friends that are not meant to die, according to Jacinta. She has shed many tears because of balloons popping, deflating or flying out the window. Just before the party she broke down and cried for ten minutes because she accidentally popped “the daddy balloon,” that had been in her room for over three weeks. In the past Keith has resurrected a few popped balloons and found a way to blow them up again. Not many people can do this and she expects us all to do the same. So as she played in the tent, she watched her savage friends popping the beloved balloons and hesitantly started to form a new relationship with her balloon friends. She poked her head out of the tent at one point needing approval, “Mom? They are popping the balloons…” I cheered her on and she went back in. A few minutes later she tried to save one from its fate and gently placed it out on the grass. Soon enough, Lily leaned out of the tent, touched it and jumped back as the blades of grass popped the balloon into bits. After a great party, lots of lovely fruit and food, a treasure hunt, and playtime she bid her friends goodbye and left without even asking to take home a balloon. Perhaps she will be cured of this extra reason for tears, this is yet another hope for her third birthday. Maybe we should pop balloons then!

Today she was asked, “When is your birthday Jacinta?” She replied, “In America.” We are all preparing for our big trip, except for Genevieve I suppose. I’ve been making lists and packing the silly things I might forget. Matt cleaned out the shed today. Jacinta and I mulched all of the trees and composted a few more. But for a three month trip, we did relatively little this week in preparation. In fact one night, I went to bed at 6:45. I figure I’ll have to pull a few late nights next week but it’s too hard to pack so early. We’ll spend next week really packing and saying goodbye to a few friends.

We’ll drive to Sydney on Thursday, fly out on Friday and end up in Chicago on Friday at midnight. We’ll spend a few days at my sister’s, a few days at my dad’s, and then a few days at my mom’s house. Friday May 25 we’ll drive to Detroit and go straight to camp which is in Almont, Michigan. Our address at the camp will be:

Matt and Shana Henry

5650 Sandhill Road

Almont, MI 48003

There is a camp phone at which you might reach us, or at least leave a message:

(810)798-8240

We will also have our old cell phone, but we may not have coverage so leave messages: (248) 722-0363

Otherwise, our email address is dependable: mattnshana@paintedguitar.com

We’ll be in Michigan until July 19 and will then spend the next month in the Chicago/Milwaukee area.

We’re looking forward to seeing you all, or at least knowing that we might hear the same shows on NPR.

Peace,

Shana

I don't need THAT much sleep

Good evening loved ones. I hear that spring has finally made its mind up to stay a while in the Midwest at least. Your longing for warmth and blooming life must be even greater than my longing for cold and hibernation. Our days are still very warm but the mornings are very cold! With Jacinta and I sick most of the week, we had to start dressing Jess heavier at night and give her a heater in the mornings. I know how to sleep under the blankets, I suppose this is a “grown up thing.” The moon has been so bright and full in the clear sky, it even lights up our bathroom through the skylight at night. It gets dark by 5:30 so we can watch the moon rise out our windows. We took the girls out after dinner on a few nights to gaze at the fire (we have a new fire pit) and at the moon, Jacinta on Matt’s shoulders and Genevieve in my arms. Yes, it is a rough life here.

We spent more time outside this week than we have lately. The mosquitoes are still abundant, but less vicious and the sun is not so intense. I have been observing the sun’s path for weeks, trying to find the best spot for our two newest trees: a fig tree to honor Genevieve’s birth and a pecan tree to honor Jacinta’s roots here in Australia. We planted a rose bush for Jacinta back in Michigan, but thought we’d better plant her a new tree here. How will we protect the tree from the goat and the cows? How can we maximize sunlight? Where can we put it so that we will take care of it, and have an accessible source of water? Finally, my indecision came to an end and we set out to plant the fig tree right outside our bedroom window. Genevieve lay in her basket gazing at the mosquito net hanging above her head. Jacinta played in the wagon with a pig and a dump truck, played with the clothes line, threw some dirt in and watered the tree. Matt and I dug a huge hole and filled it with compost. By this time Genevieve was no longer content in her basket so I bounced her while Matt built a box for the tree, mulched, then enclosed the tree in heavy duty wire to keep out the goat. The pecan tree will be planted as soon as we are all well again.

We have about twenty fruit trees now: two apples, two plums, two kiwi vines, one mango, two oranges, one blood orange, two limes, two lemons, one nectarine, one pear, one pomegranate, one lillypilly, one coffee tree, a fig tree and a blueberry bush. The aphids just killed the mandarin, I’ve finally accepted the loss. I don’t do much to merit their survival, so I should be thankful that we have only lost a few. But the aphids are on the march and we are about to leave our trees for three months. Matt built boxes for all of them so I convinced my friends Trish and Michelle to help me give our trees “some lovin.” Jess heard me use this phrase a few times and now uses it whenever she does anything for a tree, “I’m givin’ it some lovin”. I prepared a feast for lunch before they arrived in the morning. We took Jess, Genevieve and Rory out for a few hours in the orchard and took turns working hard and appeasing babies and children. We weeded the bases of each tree, wheel-barrowed loads of compost onto each tree and pruned the trees which needed pruning. My friends are good to me, this was a task for which I needed help and they happily joined me. They said the feast and good company was enough. Hopefully though, one day I’ll be giving them huge baskets of fruit.

Although I don’t give it any lovin’, my veggie garden is still providing us with food.

I still find peppers each day, as many green onions as I could ever want, and more pumpkins than I could ever consume. I now understand why pumpkins are such a good winter staple. Pumpkin plants pop out of nowhere. Even if you didn’t mean to plant them, the seeds find their way into your garden. They take over if you let them, and this year I had no other grand plans for the garden. They can be stored for over three months if the rats don’t get them. We have about twenty pumpkins almost ready to eat and it takes us at least a week to eat one pumpkin. It is to our advantage to learn to eat pumpkin, Jacinta and I are learning. Matt doesn’t mind it, he grew up with pumpkin on his plate. Edible plants that come with no effort are the most obvious example that life is a gift. This week’s volunteer was lettuce. I grew lettuce last summer when it was too hot so it all went straight to seed. The seeds found their way into the dirt and came up at a more appropriate time: autumn. So we’ll have a few salads with this and some new spinach plants before we go to the USA.

Matt didn’t get sick until Friday so he accomplished quite a bit this week. He got the urge to clean up the remaining construction mess outside our door and it looks awesome. It’s funny how you can get used to trash outside your door and then one day when it is gone wonder how you got by. I used to wonder how some people in remote Appalachian hollows lived with so much trash surrounding their homes. Now I understand what an effort it is to dig yourself out and then pay to have someone take your garbage. Matt stacked bricks, moved trailer loads of wood and metal sheeting. He built a fire pit and burnt off rubbish for days. He cleared out weeds and unwanted trees and cut a path to the driveway and lined it with logs from cut down trees. He outlined a future garden next to the house with nice big stones. Each day our yard becomes more beautiful and less cluttered. Soon Jacinta will be able to run outside the door and play while we rest assured that she’ll be safe. To unclutter the inside, Matt also built a shoe rack. While he curses himself for its ugliness, I revere the shoe rack for its utility. On top of Matt’s list of accomplishments this week is Genevieve’s American passport. After all of his hard work, it came. We can legally travel to the US in two weeks. A sigh of relief is in order.

My list of accomplishments is shorter, yes, but I am still proud of getting anything done while being sick. Being sick and being a parent don’t blend well. You can’t just say, “Ok children, let me be. I need a nap because my head hurts.” I am lucky in that Matt can relieve me when I need it most. Unfortunately, Jacinta has just as much energy whilst sick with a cold as when she is healthy. Not me! Before we got sick the girls and I spent a morning with our friends at the pool and at the park. Besides that and our tree care day, we hibernated. I played doctor with lots of herbs, teas, soups, and nutritious foods. Jacinta loves taking “medicine” and begs for it at each meal. I make our cough syrup, and although I think it tastes awful, she loves it. Otherwise, we played, read, relaxed, and dug through boxes of clothes sorting out those that were too small and those which would now fit. I successfully packed both girls clothing for our trip. It’s sad how long this took me. I laugh imagining Matt doing the same task in one fifth of the time. Oh well, I am who I am: full of indecision and too much care for which clothes my girls wear.

In lying low, I carried Genevieve less and just sat down and played with her. Obsessed with efficiency I sometimes forget that she may just want to lie down and be entertained. My general tactic is: cook, clean, organize, garden, and play with Jacinta while I lug her around in a carrier. Her entertainment can be watching what we do. Newborns do sleep a lot so for the past few months we have been in a constant state of lulling Evie off to sleep. This week it’s like she was saying, “Mom, I don’t need THAT much sleep!” We had lovely conversations like, “glah,” and “ahh.” She spent hours staring at mobiles given to her by two of her aunties. I don’t think we ever left Jacinta alone long enough to even notice a mobile, but Evie cries when they stop moving. One day she and Jacinta “played” together in the bed for about twenty minutes: Jess playing with the gnome in a mobile and Genevieve watching. It actually brought tears to my eyes. What an exciting future and a lovely present.

Jacinta made us laugh and love even more, yet also infuriated and annoyed us this week. She’s been convinced that, “Daddy’s got the skills.” She’ll say it when prompted by you know who. What kind of skills? Well, many, but noted only when he’s actually proud of his work. For example: doing dishes quickly, keeping track of his belongings, swaddling Genevieve and taking things apart and fixing them: all things at which I do not excel. One humorous moment this week was a tickling game. Matt loves to tickle his big girl and although she plays hard to get, she loves the chase and the tickles. After running away screaming and hiding under the kitchen table, Matt gave up. She then asked him to come and tickle her. He told her that he would only come when she was not ready. So she called out, “I’m not readyyyy! Come and get me now!”

Like her sense of humor, Jacinta’s strong will to do everything on her own (yet also cry and whine to be carried around) grows stronger each day. She tantrums when she is tired and whines for food whenever there is a dull moment. She cannot bring herself to apologize, she can say every word she hears except for “sorry.” WHY is her favorite word and she pronounces it with a strange broad Aussie accent that she perhaps made up, “Woah ay?” I knew this would come, the “why phase.” But I thought it was already here with her looking for reason maybe only once an hour. It has arrived in full now and is as overwhelming as the mosquitoes. It is now time to teach her that we can not answer all of the “Woah ay?” questions she has and that sometimes the answer will be “just because.” There is no silence now. I just keep hoping that both her tantrums and this terrible why repetition will miraculously come to a crashing halt on her third birthday.

We can all have dreams. My short term dream is that Genevieve will go back to sleep and have sweet dreams. Matt just spent almost three hours trying to help her sleep while I wrote this journal, and triumphantly brought her in to sleep twenty minutes ago. She is now bright eyes and bushy tailed. Sweet Dreams to you all.

Peace,

Shana